A Love Letter to My Son

By Christina Contaldi
December 29, 2019

My shoe size
has been the same
for over 20 years.

I look in the mirror,
and ever since I can remember,
the same brown eyes,
the same brown hair,
the same face,
look back at me.

I know myself.

Yet every day with you, my son,
I am confronted with
a constant of change.

When you were an infant,
I watched your baby blue eyes
morph into a hazel-brown.
And just like that,
you had new colored eyes.

Like a walking clock,
I can see the passage of time.
In your walk,
your words,
your clothes,
your mannerisms.

With every season,
your body grows;
requiring a new coat,
new shoes,
new sizes.

I’ve packed up the time
in organized bins –
0-3, 3-6, 6-12, 2T, 3T, 4T…

I watched your body
roll, crawl, wobble, walk, run.
Just when I think I know you,
you become someone else.

I’ve watched
your round belly disappear,
your chunky legs thin out,
facial features get more defined,
as the baby fat fades away.

I’ve heard, and seen you,
talk, listen, understand,
interpret, relate, express, create.

It truly is astounding
to watch you unfold.
And with each milestone, I know,
that it will soon be a distant memory.
Because more of you
is blossoming every day.

I can only hope,
that with the whirlwind of change,
you can always feel
the constant of my love.

Because whomever you become tomorrow,
you can be sure,
I will love him, too.

Christina is an odd combination of a perfectionist that insists on things happening organically, or according to nature. She wants to have all the control, yet leave life up to chance, and it is a concept that she admittedly constantly struggles with. Her love for her family puts a spark in her eye that only happens with movie effects. A self proclaimed hermit, she laughs at the hypocrisy of her love for party planning. Christina’s message is the importance of slowing down, and reclaiming joy by surrounding yourself with people and things you love. "I am going to make everything around me beautiful," she says, "that will be my life."

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